Seven reasons why you may be finding it hard to move on after breakup and how overcome them

Woman sitting on a sofa with her hands on her face. She looks upset

One of the most difficult things about a divorce or relationship breakup is moving on from it. Even when you’re physically separated and your divorce is final, it’s not uncommon to find it difficult to move on emotionally and if you’re currently experiencing this, you’re not alone. There are many reasons why you may be struggling to move on, and in this blog post, I’ll  discuss seven of them.

 

Lingering Feelings: The end of a relationship is often accompanied by strong feelings of love, anger, and sometimes even regret. These emotions can still be present long after the divorce or breakup is over and can make it difficult for you to move on, especially if you’re still in contact with your ex-partner.

Financial Reasons: The breakdown of a relationship can lead to significant financial hardships that can make it challenging to move on. For example, you may struggle to pay the bills, maintain your home, or support your children following a divorce.

Fear of Being Alone: Many people feel a sense of loneliness and vulnerability after a breakup. This is particularly true for those who were in a relationship for a long time, where being alone is a new experience.

The Stigma Surrounding Divorce: Even though divorce is becoming more common, there is still a stigma attached to it. You may feel ashamed or embarrassed about the end of your marriage or worry about how others perceive you.

Trust Issues: The end of a relationship can create trust issues that make it difficult to open up to others. This is especially true if you’ve been cheated on or betrayed by your ex-partner.

Inability to Forgive: It is not always easy to let go of the past and forgive someone who has hurt you deeply. Carrying a grudge can prevent you from moving on and finding happiness.

Lack of Closure: Closure is essential for moving on, but sometimes it is challenging to obtain. You may not have had a chance to say goodbye to your partner or to resolve all the issues that led to the breakup.

How to Start Healing and Moving Forward

Getting over the end of a relationship is never easy, but it's important to remember that you are strong and capable. Here are some ways to begin the healing process:

Acknowledge Your Emotions: Don't bottle up your feelings. Allow yourself to feel the sadness, anger, or whatever else comes up. Bottling up emotions only prolongs the healing process. A great to to process your emotions is to write them down. Buy a journal and spend a few minutes everyday writing down how you are feeling. This can be incredibly cathartic.

Build a Strong Support System: Surround yourself with loved ones who care about you and will support you through this difficult time. Talk to friends, family members, a coach or a therapist, or a support group.

Prioritise Self-Care: Take care of your physical and emotional health. Eat healthy foods, get enough sleep, and exercise regularly. Make time for activities you enjoy, even if it's just taking a relaxing bath or reading a good book.

Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself. Breakups are tough! Don't engage in negative self-talk or blame yourself excessively.

Limit Contact with Your Ex: This might be the hardest one, especially if you have children, but giving yourself space from your ex allows you to heal and move on. Consider limiting communication, especially about emotionally charged topics. Unfollow them on social media.

Start Saying Yes to New Experiences: Don't let fear hold you back. Step outside your comfort zone and try new things. Take a class, join a club, or plan a solo trip.

Seek Professional Help: If you're struggling to cope, please do seek professional help from a coach or a therapist They can provide you with the tools and support you need to move on.

Moving on from a divorce is a process, but with the right tools and mindset, it is possible to find happiness and fulfillment again. Good luck x



 

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